The Self-Awareness Lens is the one most often lost or buried in the bottom of the leader’s bag. Leaders see the word “self-awareness” and they back off as though the word itself might cause them to lose their ability to control the world around them. Yet, self-aware leaders hold the keys to the castle. Leaders from CEO Glenn Senk of Urban Outfitters to Alysa Miller CEO of Public Radio International advised University of Chicago Booth School of Business MBA students to “be self-aware by seeking as many varied experiences as possible, developing emotional intelligence and using good listening skills” as it provides a competitive edge. Leaders who are self-aware know what they treasure and hold dear, they understand how to create the right path by tapping into their wisdom, and they are fearless.

On the other hand, the experience of getting to really know oneself, and one’s personal power, can be unsettling. When leaders focus attention on themselves they may end up evaluating and comparing their current behavior to their internal standards and values, or worse still to those of others. They become self-conscious and may end up over-criticizing themselves and losing confidence.

Self-awareness does not happen overnight and it isn’t a skill that can be taught in a classroom or acquired by simply reading a book. Self awareness develops over time through a willingness to receive feedback oneself, reflect on the perspectives of others, consider new ways of being or acting, practice new behaviors and incorporate into one’s own leader behavior fresh ways of showing up. In this regard, self-awareness begins with a decion to see oneself in a new way light, perhaps one that is more or less attractive than the one they have been using for years. However, tough though it may be for people to look into themselves and see who they really are, other people are more likely to want to follow the leader who has real self-insight and understanding.

Tapping into the Self-Awareness Lens makes it possible to see from the outside as well as from the inside. This leader will pay attention to inner thoughts, physical well-being, spiritual needs, intimacy and finding and acting on a sense of purpose in living his or her life. Leaders who value the Self-Awareness Lens will demonstrate the ability to be still, reflect before responding, admit mistakes, modify patterns of behavior and seek ongoing opportunities for learning through feedback and experiences. Instead of trying to become what they are not, the self-aware leader becomes comfortable becoming more of who he or she really is, including all the flaws and idiosyncrasies that come from being human. Self awareness helps leaders work up an appetite for new insight, get comfortable with going deep in conversation with others, be transparent and err on the side of openness. Self-Aware leaders have an appreciation for the role leadership plays in all facets of their lives and they seek to integrate and align their values and their behavior.

Three Focal Points of the Self-Awareness Lens

Looking through the lens of self-awareness, leaders:

A. Commit to growing and learning every day.

• Admit mistakes.
• Show humility; yet remain determined.

B. Practice “the art of going deep” to gain new insight and understanding.

• Engage in self-reflective activities that make personal space for stillness, and contemplation
• Have the strength to stay with especially challenging or difficult circumstance until they are resolved.

C. Remain authentic, yet other-centered.

• Treat all people with genuine respect (don’t just go through the motions).
• Understand the importance of aligning intentions with word, tone, and nonverbal behavior.

This is an excerpt from Chapter VII
 of Shockproof: How to Hardwire Your Business for Lasting Success (Deb Jacobs Hamby, Garrett Sheridan and Juan Pablo Gonzáles)

This is part 5 of our Leadership Lens series.

Part 1: The Systems Lens 

Part 2 : The Value Lens 

Part 3: The Change Lens

Part 4: The Interpersonal Lens